International Women's Day: Our Global Community and Founding Purpose

Happy International Women's Day!

How fitting that International Women's Day, fall in the midsts of National Ritual Celebration Week! While we are celebrating the meaning of our individual chapter's Ritual, and the values our affiliation holds us to - it is also so important that we remember the purpose for our association and the power that such association can bring.

Association is a powerful tool that women have used throughout history to make positive change - from the role women played in the emancipation movement to women's suffrage, association and a common purpose have driven women forward to the positions of power and community we are able to pursue today.

Excuse me while I flex my academic muscles... the parallel of the American Feminist Movement and the Fraternal Movement is one that fascinates me:

While fraternal organizations have been an active source of association in the United States since 1778, many still do not understand their purpose or their role on college campuses across the country. Contemporary depictions of sorority life are centralized around images straight from television; blonde upper- class women wearing Greek letters, drinking alcohol, and looking for the most handsome and eligible fraternity brother. Not only are these images grossly misguided, but the collegiate acceptance or imitation of such are far from the goals and developments of today’s sorority women as well as those of the earliest Greek women, who’s origins date back as early as 1851 (cough cough, that's us). The grounds for development of these original associations directly sought the academic, social, and political advancement of women. Women in the mid-19^th and early 20^th centuries found themselves in the midst of a society that was extreme in gender polarization and allowed for little advancement for women in society. Women used the secret society and later the sorority as a tool to overcome the vindictive acceptance of these women as students by their male counterparts, both students and teachers. The earliest of these organizations and those that would follow under their model were formed to support female students at various colleges and universities across the United States. The founders of each of these groups developed a baseline of fundamental behaviors that would be incorporated to their academic, social and extracurricular undertakings. The primitive use for these associations acted greatly in opposition to those of men’s organizations, many of which acted with great animosity towards the few female students on their campuses.

In exploration of these organizations, the history and initial development is two-pronged. The first secret society for women began in 1851, then resurfaced with the first Greek letter organization for women in 1870 (shout out to our Panhellenic sisters!). Wesleyan Female College, the first degree-granting institute in the world for women, was home of the two first secret societies for women. In May of 1851 the Adelphean Society was founded by a young Eugenia Tucker and five of her classmates; at first this society was bound together by nothing more than a large ribbon adorning each of their dresses inscribed with their endeavor.  Unknowingly to their first members, this institution would come to touch the lives of millions of women throughout history. Their initial purpose, as regarded by founder Octavia Andrew Rush, was to “[found] the society for mutual improvement." The vocation for this “mutual improvement” was centralized on academic advancement and improvement. 

Eugenia Tucker found that many of the women attending Wesleyan were not as focused on academics as she felt they should have been. Their discourse was that of academic, religious, and political debate, committing themselves to a rigorous course of study. In the following year, 1852, the Philomathean Society, now known at Phi Mu Women’s Fraternity, would join the Adelphean Society at Wesleyan Female College, similar in their purpose and practice. While these two societies pre-dated the term “sorority,” their ritual traditions and academic ambitions would standardize the practices of such women’s organizations in the future (those Macon Magnolias will get you every time!). 

            While the foundations were being laid for collegiate associations, women had already begun to organize in similar means in the fight for women’s advancement and the advocating of gender equality. Three years prior to the founding of the Adelphean Society, nearly three hundred women gathered in Seneca Falls, New York for the Seneca Falls Convention. This two-day convention led to the drafting of the Declaration of Sentiments and Resolutions, a controversial drafting written by Elizabeth Cady Stanton. This document set forth, as former slave, statesman, and abolitionist leader Frederick Douglass the "grand basis for attaining the civil, social, political, and religious rights of women."

            Shortly after these Sentiments were signed, the first Women’s Rights Convention would take place in Worcester, Massachusetts. The first of many conventions, and a distinctive and momentous event in the history of women’s liberation, called to order the demands and details for a standardized plan of action to address the grievances against the legal and social limitations placed on females. Speakers at the convention addressed and spoke in defense of the legal limitations of women set forth by the Bible. Others spoke of the limited access of women to areas of higher education. Argued for sociopolitical changes in regard to the women’s movement, Lucy Stone argued for sociopolitical changes in regard to the women’s movement, and that women as persons had the right to vote and to own property, Abby Price spoke on the necessity to grant more open and equal access of women to employment and trade.  In addition to the recognition of the social distortion of gender roles, Sojourner Truth spoke at the convention regarding the need to recognize the disconnect of race in society and called for the equality distribution of rights for women of color that other members of the convention were working to obtain. [Passage from "Women's Development in Organizational Leadership: A Study of Women's Fraternities and their Role in the American Feminist Movement" Mary Simeoli, 2011, all rights reserved]  

          The issues faced by the early members of the Women's Convention body and by our founders are still very present and still very relevant in our lives today. While we must always strive to fulfill our Ritual promise and organizational obligations - we can also never forget the strife and oppression our founders faced as young women with a common purpose. 

Today, let us not only remember our Ritual and it's meaning, but also the importance of using our association to fulfill common goals, making this world better for generations of women to come! 

Love and Loyally

The Secret I Can Not Tell You, But....

This is my very own Ritual Book, for those that know me, you know this is my favorite thing.

I am a member of a secret society. From our founding as the Adelphean Society to our current status as Alpha Delta Pi, the practices and ceremonies I share with sisters are secret, and remain guarded by her members.

I love that I get to carry a secret... Maybe someday I will be able to pass it along to my own daughter, or niece, or even my own mom - but until then, the key is thrown away.

I can not tell you our secrets. I can not tell you our Ritual. The habitual ceremonies that take place every week, every semester, or every year. The knowledge passed from one generation to the next, the sacred seen and heard.... my lips are sealed.

Now, I have not told you our secrets, but maybe you know them? (No, I don't mean you've googled our way through Panhellenic secrets, or attempted to find out our grip or symbols)

In Alpha Delta Pi Rituals, sisters are given standards and guidelines, we make a promise of excellence like all of our fraternal brothers and sisters do in their respective ceremonies.

Each initiation ceremony may be different - while I can't tell you for sure - I'd guess they are more similar than they are different. The changes or differences between them rooted in our culture or history, our founding purpose and the development of our organizations. Our values, while we share many of our ideologies and have common community values, vary slightly from organization to organization.

Ritual is a secret I can not tell you, but it is one that I can show you.

Ritual is something I know, it is a secret I carry with me all the time. It is a promise that I made, and one that I asked my sisters to hold me accountable for.

So... am I keeping my promise? Am I living my life the way that I promised to do so? Am I valuing the relationships and cultivating the skills I said that I would?

Ritual is a secret I can not tell you, but if I am living my life the way I said I would, if I am treating others the way I said I would, if I am acting in a way that reflects the values that were shared with me... then you should be able to guess.

You should be able to guess what I was told. You should be able to guess what my promise was. You should be able to guess the meaning of the secrets I carry.

If as sorority women and fraternity men, we are truly showing others what our Ritual is, then when our new members arrive at our initiation ceremonies they should be able to say - "Oh, I should have known" or "Oh, I could have guessed."

Each and everyday we have the opportunity to show those around us our Ritual. No, you will not see inside our Ritual Book, or listen to the traditions shared only through word of mouth, but you should see it everyday. You should see it in me. Here's to trying.


Happy National Ritual Celebration Week
<3 Love and Loyally

I Love the Pin You Let Me Wear: Happy International Badge Day 2013

Having not written here since August, my poor blog is probably feeling neglected, and I find myself disappointed for not have better recorded this amazing experience. In thinking again and again about my experience (and lack of blog entries), I made a connection on this very special day. 

Yesterday, Panhellenic women around the world celebrated International Badge Day 2013. This celebration is a part of National Ritual Celebration Week, a program sponsored by our Panhellenic sisters of Phi Mu Fraternity. 

Yesterday, collegiate and alumnae sisters of all Panhellenic groups were asked to wear their sorority pins - to school, to work, to the bank, and the grocery store. We were asked to literally wear our hearts on our sleeves or as this year's theme asks "Wear your Letters on Your Heart." Established in 1997 by the National Panhellenic Conference, International Badge Day's purpose is to celebrate the Panhellenic sisterhood we share, and to show pride in our affiliation. 

Alpha Delta Pi sisters across the country sing "I Love the Pin," with great regularity, a song that our sisterhood cherish, and uses to celebrate the literal and physical symbol of our purpose and organization. And I have to say... I do love the pin. My Alpha Delta Pi badge has changed almost as much as I have during my ADPi membership experience, and tells the story of the places I have gone and the sisters I have met and shared experiences with.

"What are all those things on your pin?" I am oh, so often asked. "They are dangles," I reply with great enthusiasm. A "dangle" is a charm, and each one has a different meaning. For me, they show my involvement, my trips, my lessons learned. At first what was just a black diamond has since become my  timeline: 

October 31, 2009 - I am pinned for the first time with the black diamond badge of Alpha Delta Pi during my initiation ceremony. As a founding member of my chapter, I was pinned with a "generic" badge, simple and plain, but special none-the-less. That night at our Installation Ceremony I receive my charter member dangle, and my first officer dangle for Formal Recruitment Chair.

March 20, 2010 - I pin my Diamond Sister during her initiation ceremony using my very own Alpha Delta Pi badge. My sweet sister would give me a Diamond Sister dangle later for my birthday. 

April 25, 2010 - I was elected Chapter President, and again my badge would change... (elections happened in April since our Founding President was a senior >> Shout out to you, Kelly!!<<) 

June 24, 2010 - My first international meeting, I was able to attend Leadership Seminar in Atlanta, GA with Sister Hannah. It was the first time our chapter would participate in a summer meeting. A dangle would come with too! 

Now, dangles are all good and fun, but I will save you the recollection of my additions. This timeline would continue, and so too would the changes to my pin. As these additions came along so did my understanding and appreciation for the membership experience the black diamond represented. Each experience, each new interaction brought new friends, and ideas. My pin had been present at job interviews, at Panhellenic events, and even at my college graduation. Now my pin serves as a piece and symbol of my job. Working as a Leadership Consultant for Alpha Delta Pi I have the honor of a second guard on my badge; a symbol that for the rest of my life, will remind me of my membership in the sisterhood of the suitcase, and the culmination of everything I had worked for while in school. 

Our pin is a symbol - a beautiful piece of jewelry, but a symbol of so much more. Our pin symbolizes the promise we made to one another during our initiation and the secrets we value as sisters of this organization. It symbolizes the challenges our membership presents - and how everyday we must strive to do and be our best. Our pin as a part of our brand - a physical reminder of the way we have chosen to live our lives and the affiliation we share with women across time and space. 

Far too often, because of media, or the poor decisions of others, Greek affiliation can be something we hide. We don't want people around us to know we're Greek - it's easier than trying to explain the reality of our experience. What International Badge Day is all about is bringing us together, to those we had no idea we shared a common bond with, to express pride, and to dismantle the preconceived notions of others. So in celebration of National Ritual Celebration Week, "wear your letters on your heart" and show the world what membership in a Panhellenic organization means. 

When I wear my pin, I feel connected to those women around me, and to the women back home. When I wear my pin, I feel proud and accomplished - I know that the skills and confidence I have gained while in college and beyond and deeply rooted in what that piece of jewelry represents. When I wear my pin, I am reminded of the eight wonderful women who have been brought into my life, the International Officers, Executive Staff members, and chapter members who have blessed me far greater than I can express. 

What does your badge mean to you? 

Cheers to the pin we all know and love, and to the sisters we have and those yet to come! 

<3 Love and Loyally 

Don't Miss Your Miracle...

I have officially been an Alpha Delta Pi employee for almost a month now. Training has begun, and has flown by. I have gone to Atlanta for Leadership Seminar, home, and back again. I have met amazing leaders; women of gifts and talents. 

While I still cannot believe I am here - and have so much to share concerning this amazing opportunity, a post about LS or my time spent at Memorial Headquarters just doesn't seem quite right as the official "kick off" to this journey. 


Instead, I'd like to share a story that means a lot to me. 

In 2 Kings 5, we learn the story of Naaman. Naaman was the commander of the Syrian army. He was rich and well respected and all those around him knew who he was - he has been successful in battle many times. While very successful, Naaman was a man like any other - not immune to the discomforts or sickness of the earth. Naaman suffered from leprosy.   

Now, what does this have to do with being a sorority woman, you might ask. Just stay with me.  

Naaman has exhausted his resources and there was no hope in sight. Just then, a slave - a young Israelite who had been captured in battle - told her mistress that Naaman should go to Samaria to visit a prophet who would surly be able to cure him.  

Desperate, Naaman and his men set off.  

Naaman went to the prophet, Elisha. Elisha, too, was a well-known and important man. But Naaman arrived, Elisha did not answer the door, but instead sent a servant. The servant told Naaman to go to the Jordan River and wash himself seven times, and that upon the seventh wash, his skin would be healed.  

In a rage, Naaman shouts to the Lord. Angry that he was greeted by a servant instead of the important man he had traveled to see. While in fits of shouting, one of his own servants who accompanied him from Damascus, came to him and said - "Sir, if the prophet had told you to do something difficult, you would have done it. Now why can't you just wash yourself, as he said and be cured?" 2 Kings 13

Naaman went down to the Jordan river, and did as his servant suggested, and washed his body. Sure enough, upon the seventh time washing his body, his skin became anew - his leprosy washed away and new clean skin exposed. Naaman was healed. 

Now, if you're still with me, I share this story for a few reasons.   

In some of the most difficult times in my life - this story has served to remind me: don't miss your miracle.  

Naaman was strong and proud - as we can all be, far too often. Yet, with all his wealth and all his fame, his saving grace came from those most unlike him: the three servants. It was the poor, and the captured, and the tired, together that gave way to his miracle. 

And this is related to sorority how?!  

In our organization, and in our life, we will meet many people. We will share each path of our life with others.  When we are closed off, or judgmental, when we exclude others. We just might be missing our miracle.  

People come into our lives for a reason. Everyone of us is brought together for a purpose. When we disallow relationships to cultivate - personal, friendships, professional - we might be missing our miracle. We might be closing ourselves off to the person who was meant to give us something, to teach us something, to tell us something, to guide us to our miracle. 

When we only look to interact with those who look like us, and act like us, and dress like us, we may be closing ourselves to the chance of a lifetime.  

To the sisters with whom I have already shared this with, I hope you always remember what a blessing and miracle you all have been to me. And as this year begins, I hope that I too can continue to learn what it means to open myself up to others and to allow those I meet to teach me, just as I hope to teach them.  

<3 Love & Loyally 

I Want to Hold Your Hand

Alpha Delta Pi's best known symbol is without a doubt the diamond. Symbolic of our black diamond-shaped badge we wear after initiation, the diamond of Alpha Delta Pi is probably followed by images of woodland violets, or our favorite mascot - Alphie. However, there is another beautiful symbol of our organization that fails to receive the same recognition. To Alpha Delta Pi sisters the image and notion of "clasped hands" holds great meaning. To our sisterhood, the image on our badge is symbolic of, as our creed states, "the friendly hands clasped in the Adelphean bonds of fellowship." Our open motto "We Live for Each Other" mirrors this notion of clasped hands - when you are in need, reach out, and I will be there.

This past weekend we had our initiation ceremony and welcomed 56 sisters into Delta membership. In reflecting on our sisterhood, our Ritual, and my own chapter specifically, I began to think of these women and the displays of sisterhood and fellowship I have experienced since my own initiation. In reflecting on the past three years I realized that the Adelphean hand clasp is more than just an image or suggestion of friendship and love - that in reach out for one another, symbolically and literally, our lives become richer and more fulfilled.

It's been almost two years since I was elected president of my chapter. This time in my life was incredibly special and the entirety of my experience truly shaped the woman I am today. However, when I think back to the day I was elected there is very little I remember - I was scared and nervous, and excited - and yet one piece of that day remains very clear and distinct in my mind. In waiting to hear the results of the election, what must have been only a few minutes felt completely infinite, as if I was waiting for hours. I had made myself vulnerable to my chapter sisters, for what truly was the first time. In waiting to hear the news I was on the verge of tears - in my 20 years I had never had much success with stuff like this. Then without thought or hesitation, one of my sisters reached out and took my hand. Whether she voted for me or not - I didn't know, and I didn't really care - because I knew something much more important. She was there for me, and no matter what decision had been made by the chapter, that wouldn't change. Without saying a word the touch of her hand told me that I didn't have to be afraid or nervous alone.

A little more than a year later, I would again put myself in a vulnerable position in front of my chapter. After serving as president for almost 18 months I was getting worn down. There was a lot of frustration and negativity within my chapter - after the last recruitment it had become difficult to communicate with one another, we became to large that sisters were feeling disconnected. The feeling of disconnection was present and apparent, and none of us knew what to do - including me. It was recommended to me by a Panhellenic sister that I write a letter about my experiences to read at our next chapter meeting - I wasn't acting like myself and the negative turn had begun to effect me. As our chapter meeting was coming to a close, I opened the letter and started to read. I got as far as "Dear Sisters," before I began to cry. I was ashamed and embarrassed that I wasn't able to make my sisters as happy as they wanted. I was upset and frustrated that I couldn't solve our problems - at least not alone. The feelings I was about to share made me feel humiliated, as if by admitting them, I had let my sisters down. Then again, as my eyes began to tear up and my voice began to shake, I found myself letter in one hand, and the hand of a sister in the other. And again, the taking of my hand said that it was all alright, that I didn't have to feel any of those things around my sisters, that it was okay that I was upset and that I didn't have to deal with all of this alone. Just as a sister held my hand through the excited time, they too would be there to hold my hand when times were trying and difficult.

The Adelphean handclasp is a symbol of friendship and sisterhood, yes. But, it is also a symbol of love and compassion. It is the symbol of that solidarity, that acceptance and encouragement that we all look for when we join an organization. I will always remember the sisters who held my hands and I will always be grateful for the love and support that such a small gesture was able to give to me.

A Dream is a Wish Your Heart Makes...

I feel so absolutely honored and blessed to announce that I have been hired for the 2012 - 2013 academic year for my dream job! I will be serving Alpha Delta Pi as a Leadership Consultant and I could not feel more blessed!

Alpha Delta Pi has already given me so much and now I have the opportunity to serve others, sharing the sisterhood that I love so much, and pay forward the many gifts that have been given to me! These past four years have certainly been quite the ride - and now I've officially signed on for the opportunity of a lifetime!

My my my little ADPi.....

<3 Love and Loyally

National Ritual Celebration Week 2012: All Day Everyday, Let Ritual Be There

Happy National Ritual Celebration Week!

Ritual is a part of every fraternity man or sorority woman's experience. While this may be true, the extent to which it is differs greatly. Some collegiate members see their Ritual on a regular basis, some talk about it, some learn it, some lead their chapter in Ritual study or practice. To others, Ritual happens once a semester or once a year - it's a book, or a phrase. It may have been edited down to be a short as possible, or pages and dialog have been lost or forgotten.

While Ritual should be a part of our lives daily, this week is a time to draw special attention to it. What does Ritual mean to you? How is it a part of your life?

I think one of the biggest problems we have as collegians is really understanding what it means to "live your Ritual." "Live your Ritual" is a phrase that's becoming more and more popular - I use it all the time... #LTR for short - but can we really live the promise and practice of our Rituals if we do not understand what they mean?

As members of our organizations we make many promises - we promise to go to meetings, be on committees, go to events, raise money.... the list goes on and on. But, the most important promise we make is that of our Ritual. No matter our organization, when we go through our initiation rite we are given an expectation - one set forth by our founders - and challenged to live our lives in the path they've laid out.

No. Living our Rituals is not always easy, and no, it is not always simple. But, YES it can be done. It can be done today, and tomorrow, it can be done at chapter meetings and philanthropy events, it can be done in our classes and yes, we can even live our Ritual when we're out at a bar or surrounded by friends.

When we take the time to learn about our Ritual we learn the lessons of excellence - brotherhood and sisterhood, academic achievement, the pursuit of a higher purpose.... those things don't have to live within the confines of Sunday chapter meetings - they can be there all the time....Saturday nights included!

Take the challenge with me this week to carry your Ritual with you everywhere you go. Live your Ritual by learning a little more about it. Live your Ritual by showing compassion and sincerity. Live your Ritual by reaching out to others and sharing your experiences. Live your Ritual by going the extra mile, or showing the extra effort.

While this week might be National Ritual Celebration Week - let's celebrate the gift of our Ritual everyday, starting today - GO!


<3 Love and Loyally

I Love the Pin...

The song says "Diamonds are a girls best friend..." to sisters of Alpha Delta Pi, the diamond is more than a piece of jewelry, it's a symbol of our commitment to our sisters throughout time and space.

While the first Adelpheans wore blue ribands scripted with "We Live for Each Other" today's Alpha Delts wear the black diamond pin. Some pins are studded with pearls, diamonds, or other precious stones, and some are plain and simple - no matter the additions, they are carry the same value. Two stars and hands clasped in the Adelphean bonds of friendship guard our Greek letters, Alpha Delta Pi.




This is my badge. Between the pin and our chapter guard are dangles - like an ADPi charm bracelet, these dangles remind us of our experiences, our achievements, and our hard work. During my opportunities to travel to international meetings of Alpha Delta Pi I've loved talking with Pi sisters about their badges and their dangles - what their experience with our sisterhood has been, and what are the memories recorded by the dangles on their badges.



As sisters of Alpha Delta Pi we wear our diamond-shaped badge as a symbol and reminder of our values. The diamond has four points and so too, we as sisters have four areas to which we commit our lives to.

The Creed of Alpha Delta Pi gives purpose to each point on our badge:
"I believe that I must strive to become a well-balanced person by following the dictates of the four points symbolized by our diamond-shaped badge: first, strengthening my own character and personality; second, watching my attitudes toward my fellow-beings; third, recognizing the value of high educational standards; and fourth, developing faith and loyalty." From these words we are given the four points: Self, Sisterhood, Scholarship, and Sorority.

When we wear our pin we give call to these promises and commitments for others to see. Our badge has been worn by women across the country who share the values of our 161 year old sisterhood. When we wear our pins we carry all of this with us - all of the history, all of the sisterhood, and all of our promises. When we wear our badge we re-commit ourselves to our sisters and the tie that binds us all together becomes a little bit stronger.

As Caralee Strock Standard concluded in our creed - "I BELIEVE that these four guide-posts, guarded by the stars and friendly hands clasped in the Adelphean bonds of fellowship, will lead me to achieve a rich and useful life."


<3 Love and Loyally

Our Potential. Your Move.

Fraternity and Sorority Life is clouded by rumors, and horror stories; by judgements and negative perceptions. Everyday I defend my affiliation, my sisterhood and my community to everyone from peers to professors.

Hazing.

Drinking.

Parties.

Sexual Assault.

Bullying.

Elitism.

Yes. These are the images of Fraternity and Sorority Life cast by the news, by the media, and at its worst, by members of chapters.

No, this is not me.

I am not delusional or ignorant, I understand the horrors that occur within the Greek System, but I also understand what my Ritual means and what my community means. I also understand that I am a better person because of it. Get to know me and take your impression of Greek life from me, from my sisters, from my friends.

The Greek system is like religion - violence and conflict are all the result of misinterpretations, of misguided readings and understandings. Lives are lost because leaders of religious communities are in denial of medical practices or institutions that are there to protect us. It can be mean, and hurtful, and oppressive.

But, when it's done right - it's good for the community, it's good for the neighborhood, and the members of the congregation. It has the power to connect and encourage, it brings strength and inspires faith in people. We can be lifted up to the heavens. We learn how to become better people and want to help others do the same.


While I am proud to belong to an amazing community I know that we still have the potential to get better, to improve, to live for each other more, to seek the heights together, to aim high together.... I know that we have the potential, but it takes your move. Come get to know us, and let us get to know you! Speak to a Sorority woman today; hear her story, ask her questions. Let's see what can happen!

Thanks to NPC for such an amazing and inspiring video!

<3 Love and Loyally

Facilitation: A New Stage of Leadership

This past weekend I had the opportunity to travel to YMCA Camp Tecumseh in Central Indiana to serve as a mentor for the Alpha Beta Session of the NIC program Futures Quest! I arrived on Wednesday and met my fellow mentors at the airport. It seems funny to me now that those first few hours together were spent in relative peace and quiet since only four days later I'd sadly be leaving a group that had become its only crazy little family unit. While my new friends made my time at Futures Quest absolutely amazing, this experience also really opened me up to the next phase of leadership in my life.

During one of our first sessions we asked the members of Alpha Beta what it meant to be a leader or what leadership was. One of the brothers said that a leader is someone who allows other to lead. I took that away as being the most true definition. For most of us our opportunity to "come of age" or "set up" is when we develop our leadership skills, when we hone in on the character components we need to someday, be a leader. Our leadership styles and skills are shaped by a series of opportunities which eventually lead to officer roles or committee positions. The ironic part about leadership, is that by the time we are often deemed and recognized as leaders, our leadership style is no longer active. Our role as leaders is to create a path in which others may follow to their own successes.

At this year's Quinnipiac Leadership Conference, the keynote speaker said that the best leaders "don't pull, they push." Which brings me back to the point of my Futures Quest brother - a true leader in many ways in fully developed, they know their strengths and have worked to better develop their weaknesses. They know how to encourage, and organize; they know how to lead by example and speak to a group. A true leader can do all of these things, all while knowing they cannot lead forever - that they must allow new leadership to grow and develop and bloom.

Leadership in any form is progressive. We meet goals and expectations and then must find ways to move forward. I have been truly blessed with so many leadership opportunities during my time as a collegian but I know I must move forward from the officer-oriented leadership I have become so familiar with.

Having the opportunity to facilitate something I truly believe in was a complete blessing. I will be the first to admit, I love validation - who doesn't? - raising your hand and giving an answer to a teacher, coach, or mentor, to have them say "Yes, that's correct" or "Perfect" was something I long considered and sought out. But I have to tell you, as I have gotten older there has been no greater validation than seeing that "lightbulb" moment happen for students and peers I've gotten to work with. WIthout giving anyone any particular answer - seeing the men in my group answer questions and receiving that praise was absolutely amazing! Knowing that these young men were thinking in a new way, and seeing through a lens that I helped to provide and created for them was one of the most fulfilling leadership experiences.

There was one instance when one of the brothers in my small group practically read out of the mentor guide - giving specific examples that my partner, Taylor, and I were supposed to touch on. (Shout out to Justin!) He got it! And, nothing could have made me happier!

I can not wait for the next opportunity to facilitate these types of conversations, I've already started looking! Facilitation is so incredibly important in our community because we hold such power. Young men and women have the ability to make a huge difference in our local and global communities while at the same time, they can be at risk for making negative choices that affect us all. When leaders are able to affectively facilitate these discussions, our community leadership and emerging leaders can take ownership of the issues we are facing today to propel us forward in a way that being told what to do never allows.

I am so grateful and blessed to have gotten to work with such amazing people as I make my own Quest up the leadership summit!

<3 Love and Loyally

This is Sister President, Signing Off....

Dear Sisters,

Over the last eighteen months I have had the honor and priviledge to serve as Chapter President. I first and foremost have to say thank you. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to serve you and our chapter, thank you for your love, trust, faith and support. Thank you for giving me something that has forever changed my life. I can say with one hundred percent confidence that I would not be the woman I am today without out my sisters, our sisterhood, and this experience. Alpha Delta Pi has given me so much over the past two years - and while this time has been brief, the impact is one I don't know if I'll ever fully be able to explain.

Alpha Delta Pi is truly a gift in my life and the experiences and memories I have shared serving the chapter in this capacity are ones that will stay in my heart forever. From my first Jackie hug on big-day to the first grip by former Grand Council President Sister Claire Brown Gwantley, from Leadership Seminar in Atlanta to Grand Convention in Phoenix, and everything in between. While I will admit I have had some trying times during my term, I know that I would not be where I am today without them, I would not be the person I am without them, and our chapter would not be the same without them.

As this journey is coming to an end and others - new, exciting and different - are set to begin let me leave you with a few thoughts:

Over the summer I attended a leadership institute and one of my facilitators told us that "the walls are not there to keep you out, they are there to keep the other people out. The ones who don't care, the ones who are afraid. When you hit a wall keep going, it's not meant for you, it's meant for them." Sisters, remember that when you hit your walls in life. Excellence cannot be achieved without passion, and with passion comes heartbreak. Because you worry, because you get nervous or upset - all of those things mean that you care. When we stop worrying or thinking or looking or aspiring to change, when we rest or let one another slip through the cracks we are giving up on the promise each and everyone of us commits to during our Ritual.

Sisters, always treat one another with the upmost respect, kindness and helpfulness. This will not always be easy. We are human - we have feelings and stressors and jealousies and work. But, remember, we are all students, daughters, sisters, girlfriends, and roommates. We all carry with us a past and a story. While we all have the right to be upset sometimes - if you don't have anything nice to say, or cannot say what you need directly to the sister, then do not say anything at all.

This goes for all sisters, including officers. When you think they "don't understand," or an event or project "is stupid" remember that a sister worked hard, and put in their time and effort to complete that task or project. Did you lend your time, skills or talents? If not, it's not your place to give anything but positive support - or help with the next project if you'd like to see improvement. And sister officers, remember that at the times when you feel lost or frustrated. Remember, it's all there for us. Look to our Creed for guidance, look to our sisters for strength and look to our founders for courage. When you do this, you can have no regrets. When you do this, you can know that every decision you've made, you made with the information at hand and with the best possible knowledge. You can have the security of knowing that every step of the way you made the best choice with the options you were given, and that the choice you made, was made with good intentions for our chapter.

There will be times at home, in your dorm at school, in classes and throughout the rest of your life where you will be unsure. Uncertainly is something we can be certain of. However, you can also be certain of something else - the tie that binds us together is strong and constant. The same Ritual that ties hundreds of thousands of women through time and space so too ties us all together. Look to our Ritual for answers, and know that they carry so far beyond our time as collegians. Also, know that with that tie, I will always be here for you. I will always be your sister.

Thank you to the founding sisters - you are the women who gave me a home away from home; you have changed my life for the better. Thank you to the Leadership Consultants who have shaped my life - you have truly shown me what it has meant to live a life as women of values. Thank you to our advisors and international officers - your constant support and sacrifice has led to our chapter's success, and I personally, would have been lost without you. Thank you to the sisters I have gained over the last two years - you have loved me at my worst and supported me to be the best I can be.

I am so blessed to have been a part of this amazing organization and I can not wait to see the amazing accomplishments that are yet to come.

Love and Loyally,
Mary,
General Member
Alpha Delta Pi

"Always remember that the future comes one day at a time." ~ Dean Acheson

Me and our newly elected Sister President after chapter! (Maybe one of my fav ADPi pics of all time!)


Dean Acheson said "the future comes one day at a time..." while this is true, everything happens just one day at a time, I have to say these past 18 months have felt like they have passed in the blink of an eye. It seems like just yesterday I was handed our C.O.B. and our gavel and sent on the start of a journey that would change my life.

This past Sunday we had our chapter elections. I have to be honest - I was scared and nervous and sad - not because I was nervous for my chapter, we had 50 women interview for offices and I could not feel more blessed to have such talented and capable sisters. No, I felt scared and nervous and sad because my time is done. Yes, I will always be a sister of ADPi, I'll always be connected or involved. I'll have new adventures and responsibilities but at the same time, I could not help but feel a little bit of sadness - this amazing journey is coming to a close. And I know, that while this journey is ending another may soon be beginning - I can not help but think of all the wonderful gifts that this opportunities has given me. All of the things I have learned about myself, about others, about our chapter and our sisterhood.

That being said, I am so excited for our new officers and chapter leaders. I will never forget our I felt and I have these women never do either! The passion, the worry, the excitement that they feel not is what they will need to remember to carry them through. When things are stressful or hard, or when they're feeling overwhelmed - it is that passion that will remind them why they are doing what they are doing and help them to realize the way they will be successful.

Passion alone does not a good officer make, however. Having a successful officer transition workshop, open dialog and providing constant support (as needed of course) - helps make a sister officer the best she can be. Of course, every officer should have the opportunity to make change (that's how we grow), but at the same time - her decisions should never have to be made out of fear or worry. Having an outgoing officer there to lend an ear or a hug or even a place to vent is so valuable. What are ways that we can best help our sisters carry their new responsibilities? Ask lots of questions, work to provide lots of answers, ALWAYS remember the C.O.B. or your officer manual. Share your own missteps with your incoming officer in order to prevent mistakes from being made!!

I have to be honest not having been transitioned and never having transitioned anyone before I'm a little scared - do a pull away too much or too soon? Do I hover too close? I want our new Sister President to make mistakes and choices, to make discoveries and try new things. I was given the opportunity to serve without worry about anyone else and while that's not an experience I can re-create it is one I value and will work to ensure that she knows. As we all begin to move forward I have to remember - the future comes one day at a time... officer transition, graduation, even the Golden Lion (2017, Baby!) .... everything will come in time, and each day I'll learn how to let go a little more and she'll learn how to carry a new weight.

I am so blessed and honored and I could NOT be more proud of my chapter, it's a good feeling to know that even though I'm a little worried - I have absolutely no reason to be scared!

Good Luck, Sisters! Be amazing!

<3 Love and Loyally

To Futures Quest and Beyond!!

So my post about UIFI was incredibly long.... and I still don't feel it truly detailed how amazing the experience was, how much I loved being there or how incredible the people i met where! I'm giving you some warning... I'm anticipating writing a similar post in only a few months!

I am so excited to report that I've been chosen as a Futures Quest mentor for the Alpha Beta session this January in Indiana! "What is Futures Quest?" you might ask!

WELL....

According to the NIC Indy website - The goal of Futures Quest is to help new/er fraternity men discover their priorities and goals for their chapters and to make action plans to accomplishing them:
"Futures Quest provides leadership training to men who have joined a fraternity in the last year. The focus of the weekend is identifying personal strength and challenges, developing leadership and communication skills, exploring personal values and strength of conviction, and making a commitment to fraternal ideals. Past participants have left with a plan for their future."

I am so excited and feel so blessed to have this experience! I know that attending these types of programs can be more than inspiring and to have the opportunity to serve as a mentor and help these men discover all of the amazing things they are capable of doing - I don't know what could be better! Not to mention I am lucky enough to be serving with one of my friends from my UIFI session! I can't wait!!

<3 Love and Loyally




p.s. This is kind of a clue for some other BIG events happening in my life!

Life Moves Fast...

"Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it" ~ Ferris Bueller


I can not believe it is already November. Ferris Bueller's words have never been more true! In a semester that has been filled with exams, applications (I promise I'll come back to this one) and tons of chapter and community activities I have sadly neglected my little area of the blogosphere! While I have been writing down blog-able topics - without even realizing it, the semester has slipped through my fingers! I spent September locked in my room studying for the LSAT exam, and October was spend on applications and surviving mid-terms!

I promise to get back on track! This blog has not only been a place to share my thoughts and feelings about our chapter but it has been an amazing way for me to capture my own experiences and given me a place to reflect on my year and a half term as chapter president. It seems like only a few weeks ago I was just settling into the idea of being president - the excitement and the worry and now eighteen months later I am preparing for chapter elections this Sunday!

While I am nervous, I am also excited - we are so blessed that every woman slating for a position is amazing, strong, talented and capable! We had fifty...that's right FIFTY... women in our chapter interview for officer positions! I thought I loved and cared for these women before - but after this process I find myself simply amazed by them!

There is so much I want to catch up on here but in the mean time.... here is a quick re-cap in photos of what we have done so far this year!



We had our 'Meet the Greeks' BBQ on the Quad at QU! (This might be a fav pic of all time!)




We hosted our 1st ever Pride Olympics - our Prides for the semester were revealed at a "family reunion" party filled with field-day type games (Go Arts, Crafts, Disney Pride!!)



We've had sisterhood events like this one - we broke up and did a "speed dating" type of activity - in addition to celebrating our 2nd Anniversary and Alpha Delta Pi Day! We've also had TME's on Resume Building, Healthy Lifestyles, Voting and Ritual!



We helped to support the colonization of the newest Alpha Delta Pi chapter at Franklin and Marshall by making and packing 100 courage band bracelets!






We had a week full of competition and fun with 2011 Greek Week - this year it was 90's themed - SO much fun! Isn't our banner amazing?! We won the 'Tag it Up' competition thanks for our amazingly talented sisters!




Not to mention our Semi-formal last Friday! (I know this picture seems a little silly but a certain sister of ours is serving as a Recruitment Councilor!! *wink wink*)



These are only a few of the things we've done!! So I can assure you my time not blogging has been well spent! I promise to catch up soon! We've got so much to talk about!

<3 Love and Loyally

UIFI: Learn it. Live it. Teach it. Expect it.

Two weeks ago I got home from what was by far one of the greatest experiences of my collegiate life. In a week I wish I could replay and repeat a million times, I made friends that even now I know will last a lifetime. In our 5 day-long institute, myself and about 80 other students from across the country and cross-councils were brought together to learn some of the most important lessons of our Greek lives.

I'm sure other UIFI graduates can attest to this - after about 8 hours in our chapter house, I felt like I had known my fellow attendees my whole life. It was comforting and empowering to be in an environment where I didn't have to explain what NPC was, or how new members were selected during Recruitment. I didn't have to explain my decision to go Greek or the love and passion I feel for me chapter - we all had it, they understood.

With a solid and common foundation, large and small group discussions quickly became powerful and meaningful. While our letters may have been different, knowing that I was surrounded by men and women who share in and believe in my experience made it easy to open up. With a common thread running through us all - we were free to learn from one another and to make ourselves vulnerable.


This is my amazing chapter! Chapter 1!!

UIFI truly is an institute - all of those in attendance, from collegians to facilitators, are all there learning and growing together. Over the five days there is a combination of small group or chapter meetings, large all-group discussions, workshops, and activities. The timing of each of the discussions is very strategic and it is only on the other side that one can realize when the "ah-ha" moments happened - it's now obvious the that each conversation happen when it did. Each day has a purpose and each workshop or chapter session acted as a foundation for the next.

Each large group discussion would be followed by a chapter meeting - something I saw as truly essential and something that quickly became habit. As the issues grew bigger, the need to decompress, to give and hear feedback became invaluable. Each chapter - a group of about 8 - was lead by two facilitators. My facilitators, Maggie and David, were the perfect guides to our UIFI journey - also leading the way but never quite showing us the exact path to take. From their simple questions grew deep, self-led discussions.


Maggie and David!! The loves of my UIFI life!

Our very first task at UIFI was the UIFI Challenge Course. It was a series of mini-games and trust-building exercises, each one with so much more meaning as the week went on. The game the stuck out the most to me required each member of the team to cross from one side of the "pond" to the other. The "pond" was actually a grid drawn with chalk. In the pond there was an invisible path of Lily-pads the group had to follow..... while explaining it properly here would be almost impossible, I'll tell you this: everything I now know about being a Greek leader, it all comes back to that pond, and to those Lilly pads:
1. You never know why someone made the choice they made until you are in their position. Refrain from judgement of actions until you can understand the perspective.
2. Going through the motions of Greek life can be just as big as a mistake as trying all different directions. What is easy, is not always right.
3. From the outside looking in, things always seem easy and care-free, while from the inside looking out things can get confusing and difficult.
4. Sometimes, no matter how scary or difficult, we have to make a decision. Sometimes the choices that lay ahead of us are what is there rather than what we would like.
5. It is okay to make mis-steps but not okay to make mistakes.

The next few days after that first seemed to go by in a flash - each of us falling into a new routine: kitchen duty, meal times, free time, sing-a-longs and late nights. After two days at Indiana University the Alpha Omicron Pi house seemed like home, and the people who had previously been complete strangers were now members of my Greek family.

As the days went on the challenges became greater - first, we had to develop a sense of our own leadership style and gage the tactics and tools that we found the most valuable. Second, we were challenged to live the example, to Do What You Say You Will Do. To be the change and to act rightly on it. We also learned that excellence in leadership is not a born trait - it is an acquired skill. It must be harnessed and practiced before it can become instinct. This is when the heavy stuff started to come in - what was the reality of our leadership? The reality of our community? Can Greek life be sustained on the path we currently sit? The next morning our panic from the night before was put to good use - our anxiety given an outlet in action! We took to the streets to volunteer in the Bloomington community.

That night - a strong feeling of "now what?" sat on all of our shoulders. We had heard and seen and discussed the challenges and detriments of the Greek community. We were scared and nervous. We had all of this energy and yet we had little idea what to do with it. Then, one of the most powerful and empowering experiences took place. Sitting all together in a large group session, attendees were asked to stand and share their creed. Members of the same chapter from across the country stood together to recite the words of their founders, facilitators and their collegiate counter-parts joined voices, proclaiming the power of their affiliation. I was moved in a way that I can not quite describe. I felt truly blessed and still am so grateful to have witnessed the passion and conviction in which the various creeds were recited.

That was it. After that moment things seemed to click - each chapter member having their own "ah-ha" moments. It wasn't going to be easy to make changes, we all knew that now - it was going to be hard. We were going to have to gather all our courage and all of our strength in order to be the change we wanted to see.

One of the facilitators, Erin, quote Pete Smithhisler, the President and CEO of the NIC - he once said that "To know Pete Smithhisler, is to know Lambda Chi Alpha." To me, this describes the entire sentiment of UIFI, of what Greek Life should be, and what Greeks as individuals should strive for.

To know me, is to know Alpha Delta Pi.
If I were to live my Ritual, maybe not being 100% successful 100% of the time, but to try and live my life so that my actions always had a congruence with my sorority's values...what a life that would be? As my facilitator David said - "it's the endless pursuit of excellence." For us, it is the journey that matters and that makes all the difference.

Yes, I accept that not everyone cares, or agrees. Yes, some members are in it for only four years and not for life. Some say they used to be a member instead of saying that they are. But in front of my chapter and now in front of the world wide web, I made a commitment - to never be one of those people. Yes, I accept that those people are out there but please know: I have learned my Ritual, I am working to live my Ritual, through my actions I hope to teach my Ritual and from my peers I expect them to do the same.

UIFI was amazing, empowering, and an experience I will never forget.

There was a lot of learning:



a lot of dancing:




a little bit of identity crisis (POP THAT GAMMA):



and a whole lot of memories.

Now it's just time to put it all to use!
"I am ready to act if I can find brave men and women to help me." ~ Carter G. Woodson, Omega Psi Phi

<3 Love and Loyally