Thursday, January 19, 2012
Fraternity and Sorority Life is clouded by rumors, and horror stories; by judgements and negative perceptions. Everyday I defend my affiliation, my sisterhood and my community to everyone from peers to professors.
Yes. These are the images of Fraternity and Sorority Life cast by the news, by the media, and at its worst, by members of chapters.
No, this is not me.
I am not delusional or ignorant, I understand the horrors that occur within the Greek System, but I also understand what my Ritual means and what my community means. I also understand that I am a better person because of it. Get to know me and take your impression of Greek life from me, from my sisters, from my friends.
The Greek system is like religion - violence and conflict are all the result of misinterpretations, of misguided readings and understandings. Lives are lost because leaders of religious communities are in denial of medical practices or institutions that are there to protect us. It can be mean, and hurtful, and oppressive.
But, when it's done right - it's good for the community, it's good for the neighborhood, and the members of the congregation. It has the power to connect and encourage, it brings strength and inspires faith in people. We can be lifted up to the heavens. We learn how to become better people and want to help others do the same.
While I am proud to belong to an amazing community I know that we still have the potential to get better, to improve, to live for each other more, to seek the heights together, to aim high together.... I know that we have the potential, but it takes your move. Come get to know us, and let us get to know you! Speak to a Sorority woman today; hear her story, ask her questions. Let's see what can happen!
Thanks to NPC for such an amazing and inspiring video!
<3 Love and Loyally
Posted by Mary at 11:20 PM
Saturday, January 7, 2012
This past weekend I had the opportunity to travel to YMCA Camp Tecumseh in Central Indiana to serve as a mentor for the Alpha Beta Session of the NIC program Futures Quest! I arrived on Wednesday and met my fellow mentors at the airport. It seems funny to me now that those first few hours together were spent in relative peace and quiet since only four days later I'd sadly be leaving a group that had become its only crazy little family unit. While my new friends made my time at Futures Quest absolutely amazing, this experience also really opened me up to the next phase of leadership in my life.
During one of our first sessions we asked the members of Alpha Beta what it meant to be a leader or what leadership was. One of the brothers said that a leader is someone who allows other to lead. I took that away as being the most true definition. For most of us our opportunity to "come of age" or "set up" is when we develop our leadership skills, when we hone in on the character components we need to someday, be a leader. Our leadership styles and skills are shaped by a series of opportunities which eventually lead to officer roles or committee positions. The ironic part about leadership, is that by the time we are often deemed and recognized as leaders, our leadership style is no longer active. Our role as leaders is to create a path in which others may follow to their own successes.
At this year's Quinnipiac Leadership Conference, the keynote speaker said that the best leaders "don't pull, they push." Which brings me back to the point of my Futures Quest brother - a true leader in many ways in fully developed, they know their strengths and have worked to better develop their weaknesses. They know how to encourage, and organize; they know how to lead by example and speak to a group. A true leader can do all of these things, all while knowing they cannot lead forever - that they must allow new leadership to grow and develop and bloom.
Leadership in any form is progressive. We meet goals and expectations and then must find ways to move forward. I have been truly blessed with so many leadership opportunities during my time as a collegian but I know I must move forward from the officer-oriented leadership I have become so familiar with.
Having the opportunity to facilitate something I truly believe in was a complete blessing. I will be the first to admit, I love validation - who doesn't? - raising your hand and giving an answer to a teacher, coach, or mentor, to have them say "Yes, that's correct" or "Perfect" was something I long considered and sought out. But I have to tell you, as I have gotten older there has been no greater validation than seeing that "lightbulb" moment happen for students and peers I've gotten to work with. WIthout giving anyone any particular answer - seeing the men in my group answer questions and receiving that praise was absolutely amazing! Knowing that these young men were thinking in a new way, and seeing through a lens that I helped to provide and created for them was one of the most fulfilling leadership experiences.
There was one instance when one of the brothers in my small group practically read out of the mentor guide - giving specific examples that my partner, Taylor, and I were supposed to touch on. (Shout out to Justin!) He got it! And, nothing could have made me happier!
I can not wait for the next opportunity to facilitate these types of conversations, I've already started looking! Facilitation is so incredibly important in our community because we hold such power. Young men and women have the ability to make a huge difference in our local and global communities while at the same time, they can be at risk for making negative choices that affect us all. When leaders are able to affectively facilitate these discussions, our community leadership and emerging leaders can take ownership of the issues we are facing today to propel us forward in a way that being told what to do never allows.
I am so grateful and blessed to have gotten to work with such amazing people as I make my own Quest up the leadership summit!
<3 Love and Loyally
Posted by Mary at 10:50 PM